Anywho, that line never left me. When I first read it years ago, I thought it was so hilarious and so-omg-true. Newsflash: it's still true. Never is it more true than today. Let me 'splain.
If you didn't read Glennon's hilarious blog post, I will summarize it for you: Basically, she's at the food court with her 3 filthy kids, feeding them junk food, and trying to decide how to leave her kids alone to go refill her Coke. Then, she sees another mom with an impeccably dressed child (sitting in a high chair cover to prevent germs) break out an avocado and a spoon and begin to feed her quiet child. Glennon's own sense of lack, feeling of parenting-failure, and generalized mom-shame comes rushing in as she concludes that this woman's actions were directed AT HER.
Do you see where this can apply to some people in your life?! Or **GASP** maybe even YOU?!
These days, everyone is so SEN-SA-TIVE. You can't post something online about living a healthy lifestyle without someone posting a trying-not-to-sound-defensive-but-it-totally-reads-as-defensive response. I get it all the time with my nontoxic home posts--if not on the post, behind my back. GUYS. I am trying to educate the world about the crappola that is in our everyday products that we have been BIOACCUMULATING for years into our tissues. If you are feeling convicted about it, the way I see it, you can do one of two things:
(1) Hide my posts from your newsfeed or unfollow me on Instagram.
or
(2) DO something about it. Step out of your comfort zone and attend a class. Learn a thing or two. Start replacing your products with cleaner ones. Take that conviction as a sign that it's time to start making changes, no matter how small.
You really do have a choice. You don't have to like my avocados. And I don't have to like yours.
You really do have a choice. You don't have to like my avocados. And I don't have to like yours.
Another example: One time I posted a funny "Adopt/Don't Shop" meme after we adopted my pooch Presley. Batman was slapping Robin in this meme and I thought it was pretty funny! I didn't tag anyone in the caption or even rail against people who buy pure-bred dogs. Heck, lots of people in my family do that. Whatevs.
Or so I thought. A friend of mine got angry at me for an unrelated post and private messaged me that I was "the most judgmental non-judgmental person" she knew. She threw an old blog post that I had written about loving our natural bodies in my face and said that I was shaming her for her tummy tuck. She also said that my funny Batman meme about adopting pets was a stab at the fact that she had just purchased a pure-bred dog. Never mind that I had NO FREAKING CLUE that she had just gotten a tummy tuck or adopted a pure breed; in her mind, I was blogging AT HER. I was thrusting my natural, environmentally-friendly ways AT HER. I was the judgmental one.
Here's a thought: Live your life. I'll live mine. If you don't like my choices, keep scrolling or hide/unfriend me. Why do people feel the need to think that others are making choices AT THEM and that they need to defend why they did not make that choice? I guess it's all down to freedom of speech. Meaning...they have the right to let everyone know how they feel when they feel it.
Caca. I know I have freedom of speech. But I also have the freedom to not be an A-hole as well. Good God, do you know how many times I had to refrain from posting a response on someone else's post during election season?! My rule was, if it's on their wall, let 'em post it. Let 'em believe it. Let 'em feel it. If it's on MY wall, please extend me the same courtesy. When I post things, I know I'm not going to sway anyone who is vehemently opposed to my belief, political leaning, way of living, etc. My posts are written for those who are genuinely interested and those who are on the fence and would consider opening up a healthy dialogue on the topic at hand. They aren't written to shame anyone else, and if they are ever consistently viewed that way, then I need to change my delivery.
I'll close with this. Just so you know, I'm preaching to my own choir. ME. Avocados have been directed at me, in my own perception. I've gotten riled up at posts that others have written thinking they were passive-aggressively directed at me, with no direct evidence of it. Who is it harming? ME.
I've gotten irritated at Erik for being so damn perfect; thinking he expected the same of me. Come to find out, he's just that way and he loves me JUST AS I AM. All my pissed-offness was for naught and came from my own insecurities. And that's what it boils down to--insecurities. We read and process things through our unique filters and how we respond is a direct reflection of the shame we feel within. To quote Eleanor Roosevelt: "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."
So next time you find yourself eyeballing the woman next to you, feeling like her lifestyle/parenting/political/religious choices are avocados that are spears directed in your direction, perhaps stop and take a breather. YOU get to choose how you interpret the world you encounter. You are in charge of your tiny sphere of rippling destiny.
xoxo,
Michelle
So next time you find yourself eyeballing the woman next to you, feeling like her lifestyle/parenting/political/religious choices are avocados that are spears directed in your direction, perhaps stop and take a breather. YOU get to choose how you interpret the world you encounter. You are in charge of your tiny sphere of rippling destiny.
xoxo,
Michelle
